Before you turn off the idea of dating completely, just know that not everyone is going to be the love of your life. Also, you might meet your perfect mate at a bar or a coffee shop today, but tomorrow that guy might be working night shifts or struggling with a gambling problem, and he won’t be showing you his face unless he’s sober. So we’ve got our own pro tips for getting over the nerves and having good conversations without actually being interested in the end goal.
Nervous but optimistic? We’ve got your back.
Actively Trolling the Bar With Friends but Scared of Dating and College
We’ve all been there. You’re a badass, cool loner who’s proud to be social, and you’re looking to meet a hot guy, only the problem is, you don’t really know how to go about it. That’s why you’ve got a group of friends at the ready to go with you into the scary world of cute. You’re acting all casual—and you’re probably trolling for women—but you’re not really looking for anything real because you’re too nervous to show your face and your game is a little weak right now.
It’s easy to fall into this trap. Fear can play tricks on the mind. Don’t be ashamed of being the friend that keeps the matches at a distance, but make sure you’re doing it because you’re genuinely not interested. Don’t be tempted to keep things in the friend zone longer than you should, because as your confidence grows and you start to get hooked, it could be pretty difficult to let go. The end result of this could be that you’re feeling insecure, like you can’t trust a guy who loves you, or that you’ll be dumping a guy you feel is just too nice.
Even if you feel like you have all the right tools for dating a stranger, you still might not be the right guy for that girl (or guy) out there. If you see someone you like, go for it. Do what feels right to you, but remember to be safe.
Where to Meet New People for Casual Dates
Face it, you probably don’t know where to go to meet new people for casual dates. Like, you might go to an open-mike night hoping you’ll have a great one-night stand, or you might go to a bar hoping a guy will dance with you and ask you to go on a date. But if you actually want https://ukrainepersonals.net/meet-single-ukrainian-girls-online-and-enjoy-quality-time.html
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Turn off your phone. No, seriously, turn it off. Whether it’s an old-school flip phone or a smartphone, don’t use your dating app or message-based e-mail service while you are in a bar or restaurant. Texting and eating are two quintessential things to do at a bar, but it turns out that they go together like chicken and salad and mayonnaise—and that’s just wrong. We’ve all met people at bars with phones glued to their ears and we’ve seen people swear at their phones just because they got an e-mail. Just turn your phone off.
When you arrive at the bar or restaurant, make sure you have a charger so you can make sure your phone is set to silent. Better yet, you can use one of these mini-USB car chargers to keep your phone in your hand at all times.
Put down the phone (okay, turn it back on). This goes for alcohol too, by the way. Yes, you should technically be drinking with your mouth, and your phone should be accessible on the table—but if you’re at a bar or restaurant, it probably isn’t going to be serving you food. So, turn your phone off. Be professional, but be ok with drinking without talking. You can go back to talking later.
Prepare for a long night of “socializing.” This is also true for alcohol. Your date is probably going to want to go out for a lot of different reasons—from drinks to dinner to dancing to whatever else your friends do. By ditching your phone, you’re not only making it easier for yourself, but you’re also sending the message that you are interested in just the two of you. Remember that both you and your date are equal, and you should make time for both of you.
Do not respond to drunken e-mails. Seriously. No matter how naughty you think that drunk text message was, do not reply to it. Save all of your dirty texting for your pillow, and set your phone to silent. Plus, if you respond to a drunk text, your friend will think, “Oh, that’s how he usually talks, it must be okay then.” If your drunk friend actually thinks that, forget about him or her as a friend. Actually, leave the friends you’ve made at the bar/restaurant.
Have a plan. While you might feel like you don’t have to say much in the early stages of
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